[This is why his wrists and ankles are bound, it's rather easy to keep a hand on his shoulder and knees to keep him down.]
It's like trying to hold sand when your hands keep spasming. Sometimes you can keep the sand there, keep it for a while. But then your fingers twitch and so much sand is gone in an instance.
What's worst is you have a sense that something is wrong. That isn't the right amount of sand still in your hands. Or. Maybe it is? What amount should there be?
But the sand is your thoughts. Your memories. Your knowledge. Over and over, you start to realize something is wrong, but you can't. Keep. Enough sand to figure out what.
That's what happened when my heart stopped.
Do you want a life where you can't even remember what nitroglycerine even is most days?
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It's like trying to hold sand when your hands keep spasming. Sometimes you can keep the sand there, keep it for a while. But then your fingers twitch and so much sand is gone in an instance.
What's worst is you have a sense that something is wrong. That isn't the right amount of sand still in your hands. Or. Maybe it is? What amount should there be?
But the sand is your thoughts. Your memories. Your knowledge. Over and over, you start to realize something is wrong, but you can't. Keep. Enough sand to figure out what.
That's what happened when my heart stopped.
Do you want a life where you can't even remember what nitroglycerine even is most days?