video; un:arealscourge

[hog_wild]

[ The video turns on, showing an anthropomorphic hedgehog. You might notice, if you were colorblind, that he looks exactly like a certain blue hedgehog, save for the leather jacket, sunglasses, and two scars across his chest and stomach. Oh, and the teeth. He's got a mouth full of sharp, jagged teeth.

For those of you who are inclined towards seeing color, he looks different from Sonic due to having green fur and blue eyes. And then there's the way he carries himself, which is in a manner akin to a delinquent. He stares at the screen for a moment, as if scrutinizing it, before his mouth twists into a grin and he begins speaking. ]

'Sup. The name's Scourge. Scourge the Hedgehog. Once and future king of planet Moebius. That's Moebius with an "e", by the way. Be sure to properly pronounce it!

Anyway, I got yanked out of a pretty important operation with my team. Thanks for that. Loooooved the white threads I got saddled with when I first showed up here, too. [ He rolls his eyes. ] This place does a great job of ingratiating itself to newcomers, you know that?

Anyway, I just figured I'd introduce little ol' me. No grandstanding. No showin' off. I got plans, but I've learned that I've got to earn my reputation instead of taking it for granted. Maybe I'll make a name for myself, maybe I won't.

[ He grins wider. ]

We'll just have t'see. So what's the rest of your stories?

Comments

un:happyaround

[roundandaround]

Hi! Hm... hmm. Does being the once and future king mean you used to be the king, then you weren't the king, and then you were again?

[Rinku sways from side to side as she thinks, swishing her tail.]

[hog_wild]

It means I was, then I wasn't, and that I plan to be again, kid.

You're a weird Overlander, having a tail and all.

[roundandaround]

I dunno where Overland is, but I'm an otherworlder like you!

[She pulls back the hood on her jacket; she's got fluffy giraffe ossicones matching the tail. And scars like cracks across her face, but that's a separate deal.]

Though I didn't always have these. The guilds said it was "reckless and irresponsible animal shifting," but either way, I just kinda ended up like this. Nice to meet you! I'm Rinku!

[hog_wild]

What are you, then? One of those "humans" I've heard so much about?

So wait, you just give yourself a tail and horn things? That's freakin' weird. You're weird, Rinku.

[ Scourge is not polite, apparently. ]

[roundandaround]

Yeah! I think I'm still human, anyway. I show up as "human" on magic scans unless I cheat with dragon-blessed powers.

[Rinku pouts, but seems to brush the insult off quickly.]

Lots of people say that, but that's okay! I think everyone's pretty different. There's all kinds of people all over the place!

[hog_wild]

"Dragon-blessed" what now? You need to slow down, kid. You're confusing the heck out of me. I have no idea what you're going on about!

un: abnormalitylover, video

[abnormalizes]

[Here's Evangeline, grinning and...]

Oh, hi! My name's Evangeline, and my story is I have a cool hat.

[Sure is a hat, alright. 'Fish fear me, hedgehogs want me.' She absolutely would not be showing this first thing to someone had she not met a version of them and gotten their (bad) vibes before.]

[hog_wild]

That hat makes a pretty presumptuous statement, girlie. This particular hedgehog has learned his lesson and is a one woman guy these days.

[abnormalizes]

Oh, shit, really? I'm so sorry!

[Genuine contrition. She immediately takes the hat off.]

There was a version of you here before who was - uh playing the field is a nice way to put it - so I just assumed, sorry!

[hog_wild]

Yeah, that sounds like the old me. But then the less old me spent some time in Zone jail, only managed to get out because of her, and learned the value of connecting with your team and all that horseshit. I would still be in that hole and a shadow of my former self if not for her, sooooo....

[ He shrugs his shoulders. ]

Yeah, not interested.

[abnormalizes]

Honestly, good for you, she sounds like a keeper.

You do still need to touch people semi-regularly to not turn into a statue here, but spars, handshakes, fistbumps et cetera work fine.

[hog_wild]

She's one bad bitch, lemme tell 'ya. Her name's Fiona.

Huh. Well, I do like hitting people.

Video; un: havenofear

[heyyourenotsonic]

[ Huh. That's weird... he looks kinda familiar. But also not? Definitely green. And definitely hedgehog shaped. No matter. ]

Hi, Scourge! My name's Amy Rose and uh, wow. It seems like you've been through a lot.

[hog_wild]

[ Scourge is both not happy to see her after the role she played in deposing him and yet also very glad she's not Rosie. ]

You could say that, yeah. You Sonic's fangirl like the Amy on Mobius?

[heyyourenotsonic]

[ Oh. He knows Sonic. She laughs and waves her hands around. ]

We're just friends! No fan girling here!

[ ....m....mostly. ]

[hog_wild]

Huh. That makes you pretty different from the Amy's and Rosies I know, then.

Unless you're lyin'.

[heyyourenotsonic]

Aha, no. That ship sailed a while back. He's one of my best friends, and that's all.

[hog_wild]

Ain't that cute. Pinky got character development.

I wish the Rosie in my world would freakin' get over me. That chick's obsessed!

Video; UN: UltimateLifeform

[shatteredprison]

[Another hedgehog appears on screen. This one black and red wearing a suit. Yep. That's a suit Shadow has on.]

And what are your ambitions, exactly?

[hog_wild]

What are you supposed to be, "Ultimate Middle Management"?

[ He snickers at his own joke. ]

My ambitions, Shadow, are to reclaim my throne and make a name for myself while I'm here! Exactly how I'm gonna do the last part remains to be seen, but I'll figure it out!

[shatteredprison]

I am employed as a combat and weapons instructor.

[The joke is met with blunt literalness.]

To be King in Ellipsa? Hm. Considering we have gods here, such a low bar. Perhaps not as ambitious as I thought.

[hog_wild]

And that means you have to dress like a stiff?

[ He snorts. ]

Why would I want to be king here? I'm talking about getting back to Moebius and ruling there, you freakin' weirdo. I have no interest in bein' a god! That's too much responsibility. You gotta manage the whole cosmos and shit!

voice, un: ultimatelysuperior

[ikeasnob]

Most of the people here are pathetic, so knowing them is a waste of time.

[hog_wild]

Oh hey, this sounds like another Shadow! But is he dressed like he carpools to a nine to five too, I wonder?

[ikeasnob]

Ironic, coming from the hedgehog dressed like he fell out of a cheap movie.