un: kantera, text

[happydreamed]

If this adventure with chain mail has taught me anything, 'tis that many of us here are having our first exposure to the internet, with all its amusements and pitfalls included. Thus, I thought it might be nice to introduce another 'getting to know each other' game that some of us might not know yet. This one won't involve pictures or ratings of attractiveness, not to worry.

This game is called 'two truths and a lie'. The premise is simple. You list three statements about yourself, two true and one false. Ideally they should all be similar levels of unbelievable. Then, other people respond to you to guess which one is the lie. We all learn a little about each other and have a bit of fun.

Comments

[nihilmancy]

Is that the one that you think is a lie, then?

[imagirl]

I don't know.
I don't think it's a lie? I'm just surprised.
It's kind of familiar.

[nihilmancy]

It's not a lie. I asked it because it seemed like others had different experiences with their society's relationship to matters like that. It put a spark of curiosity in me.

[imagirl]

That makes sense.
I was curious because it sounded like something kind of familiar

private

[nihilmancy]

Am I correct in assuming that you're like me, then?

[ Did she accidentally put herself in the role of giving people she doesn't know therapy. Help. ]

Re: private

[imagirl]

oh
I tried to be a boy for a long time?
yeah.
it took me a while to figure it out.
Pretty recently, actually.

[nihilmancy]

I understand that that is how it goes for a lot of people. I had an uncle who did not embrace manhood until he was 156.

We never got along, but not because of that.

[imagirl]

Oh wow. Glad I didn't wait THAT long or I'd have been pretty old.

[nihilmancy]

That is good. The idea of reevaluating yourself and how you live is not an easy one. However that process plays out, it belongs to you.

[imagirl]

It took me a while, honestly.
It's a complicated story but I'm glad I worked it all out.

[nihilmancy]

Indeed. I am glad for you.

[imagirl]

How long did it take you to like, figure it out?

[nihilmancy]

[ Ah, here's the part where she makes this poor girl very jealous. Unfortunately, she doesn't have enough delicacy to just back off. ]

I was eight.

[imagirl]

wow.
I was trying really hard to be a boy then.
even though I had to pretend to be a girl.

[nihilmancy]

I am confused.

[imagirl]

so in my town twins of the same sex were considered like really bad fortune.
so my parents had to pretend they had a son and a daughter when my brother and I were born
and even though in private they treated me like a boy I had to be a "girl" publically
And I got really obsessed with proving the superstition wrong
And was trying really hard to be manly
And that's why I became a bounty hunter?

[nihilmancy]

[ Learning of that superstition nauseates her, a little. ]

That must have been terribly complicated and difficult for a child to go through. You have admirably established a new basis for your life, it sounds like.

[imagirl]

Yeah.
For a long time I thought I needed to really be a man to prove it wrong.
And then I brought home a lot of money and showed I wasn't bad fortune and was a man and all that stuff
but I still wasn't happy, you know?

[nihilmancy]

[ Is Hlasoh happy? Doing what she does, being who she is? It's not something that she tries to agonize over. Certainly, it would have been much harder if she'd never had that realization about herself. She can be grateful for that. She has purpose, and convictions. She does what she has to, so that she can live by them.

But seeing this girl navigate the labyrinth of herself to be who she must be stirs some feeling in her. She keeps it carefully tucked away. ]

I see. And did you know then, the cause of your dissatisfaction?

[imagirl]

i dunno
i think i sort of did but i wasn't ready to say it?
bc i'd just spent all this time proving i could be a boy and not be bad for the town?
so turning around and saying like "actually no, i WAS a girl the whole time!"
felt like way too much
and i think
i was scared of what my parents might say
or think

[nihilmancy]

A situation like yours must be exceedingly rare.

I was fortunate that there was little social stigma where I'm from towards people like us, and therefore I experienced no mental reservations towards identifying and acting on my true will, once I discovered it.

Take heart. One major burden has been lifted for you. Whatever comes afterward can only be lighter.

[imagirl]

It's definitely not usual, I guess.
And you're right! The future is wide open. I want to see what happens!

[nihilmancy]

What do you want to happen?

[imagirl]

I don't really know.
I'd like to keep being me.
I'd like the people i care about to see that I'm still me, even if I change this.

[nihilmancy]

The people in your own world, you mean?