video; un: maine

[slaughterous]

[ The video opens on a close-up of a truly kick-ass vehicle. It's tough! It's rugged! It's got hooks on the front that look like tusks! Truly, this is one bad-ass—

The video zooms out. The vehicle is tiny. A child could ride in it, maybe. But certainly not an adult.

An extremely gruff male voice mutters, ]

What the fuck.

[ Then a woman's laughter rises in the background. "What, Maine, compensating for something?"

The man grumbles, and the feed clicks off. ]

Comments

un: 六耳獼猴

[castaside]

Item from home gone wrong? [ Believe it or not, Macaque isn't laughing outright. Despite this being pretty funny. He's trying not to be a pain for Wash's sake. ]

[slaughterous]

[ That would be an affirmative grumble. ]

Tiny.

[ He's so offended! ]

[castaside]

I might be able to help with that, if you like. My magic is all sorts of useful.

[slaughterous]

[ The grumble is more thoughtful this time! ]

How?

[castaside]

Um... magic? [ Not a sarcastic reply, he's just not sure where the disconnect is since he's pretty sure he said that already. ]

[slaughterous]

[ A quiet sound that, if they're watching/listening, Wash or Carolina will recognize as, "Ugh, gotta use more words." ]

How's it work?

[castaside]

[ He's pretty sure that this isn't a technical question. ]

Making things bigger, or smaller, is pretty easy. I just have to know how big you want the thing and a little concentration should do it. No wands or anything, even.

Consider it a gift to repay our last interaction. [ Macaque isn't going to deny that he was messing with Maine, but that was before knowing who he was. And then he was a tad protective but, in his defense, it was for a good reason which he isn't going to explain because he promised Wash he'd drop it. ]

un:happyaround

[roundandaround]

Eh? It looks cool! Is that a toy for Blue-chan?

[slaughterous]

No. Supposed to be big.

[ But it sure is Pokémon-sized… As if to prove the point, Blue-chan wanders over to the vehicle. He would definitely fit! ]

[roundandaround]

Oh! Like how people and things that come here sometimes come shrunk if they're supposed to be big! I think there's a magic thing at the store for that.

[slaughterous]

[ Blue-chan paws at the door like he's trying to get inside. Maine grumbles. ]

Riki's? Store's closed.

[ Until the last week of the month, apparently! ]

[roundandaround]

[Ah, the power of handwaves versus reward schedule...]

Does he know how to drive?

[What do you think, Rinku...]

[slaughterous]

[ Long pause. ]

Dunno. Looks eager.

[ Is he about to the let the fucking Pokémon drive. ]

voice l un: bishop

[skyscrapes]

I was under the impression automobiles were a little.... bigger than that.

voice right back!

[slaughterous]

Are. Way bigger.

[ And yet. ]

[skyscrapes]

That seems a little doll-sized to me.

[ Despite the tone he's not trying to be mean! He just sounds vaguely nervous. ]

[slaughterous]

Came here wrong.

[ Maine approaches the vehicle, sticking out a big hand to poke at a tiny headlight.

SSSSSSIGH. ]

[skyscrapes]

[ Bertholdt laughs a little, under his breath. ]

I-it's not the first time I've heard of something showing up too small. There's an item you can get for free from the shop to make it the right size again.

[slaughterous]

Riki's Shop?

[ Maine has heard of it. He's wondering if the item actually works. ]

Ever used it?

un:cattington

[schrodingerscockroach]

Yeah, they do that with bigger things.

[ALSO CAROLINA.]

[Time to figure out how he can talk to her without Maine around because....you know...GOTTA touch base on some things.]

[slaughterous]

[ GRUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE. ]

Bullshit.

[ He wants his proper-sized Warthog, dammit! He went through a lot of effort to steal that thing! ]

[schrodingerscockroach]

There is a potion you can get at the end of the month that fixes it. Return to normal or something like that.

[slaughterous]

Too long.

[ Because "patience" is one Winter trait Maine doesn't have in spades. ]

Macaque's fixing it.

[schrodingerscockroach]

He can do that?

He really is multi-talented. [Didn't know shape changing OTHER stuff was in his skillset.]

[slaughterous]

Didn't know?

[ Damn, Wash. He's your boyfriend! ]